Getting Defensive, Part 2

During the spring of 2003 I volunteered with my freshman floor to participate in Relay for Life. That morning I went to the business school lounge to study for a chemistry test that was scheduled for later that week. I sat in the room, alone most of the time, while groups of student came in out out to meet for their classes. As I sat there looking down at my books, I felt a person come in. I actually smelled a person come in. My sense of smelt is my strongest sense. I remember people more for their smell than for their name, or their face for that matter. This person had very strong smell of men's cologne. But not the nice kind. The cheap bad kind. And this guy had practically taken a bath in it. I thought this was weird so I looked up. He was a black, tall male with short hair, wearing white shorts, a bright orange shirt, white socks, white sneakers, and a backpack. He sat on the table across from me. From the corner of my eye I saw he had a calculator and a cell phone. No notebooks. I thought it was weird but continued on with my studies. I hear he starts pressing buttons on his calculator. I'm wondering what he's calculating without a pen or a pencil and paper to write stuff down. But I continue on with my studying. Suddenly I hear that his breathing is getting heavier and he starts panting. I start to look up. The guy was masturbating. I quickly look back down and stare and my book. It felt like years passed while I stared at my book trying to decide a course of action. Suddenly he gets up and leave. I take my first breath in what felt like forever. I figured it was over. But no. He comes back. I took this as my signal to pack my bags and leave. As I'm leaving the building towards the student center, I frenetically called my mom who frenetically asked me to hung up and call the police. So I did. I described what happened and gave them a physical description of the guy. Continued my way to the student center and decided to hide in the girls bathroom. I called a friend to come get me. I didn't want to be alone. But my phone had no signal in the bathroom. So I walked towards the cafeteria. The guy was sitting there now. I quickly turned around, my friend was still on the phone and I hung up. Called the police to tell them the guys new location. As I left the student center a crew of police officers ran towards me into the building. I ended up back in the business school where I called my friend again to take me back to my room. Once the guy was caught I had to go back to the station and identify the subject, from every darn angle. That was weird. They had the guy handcuffed, standing by a police car. I was sitting in a van with tinted windows a few feet away. I was scared to look up and face this guy again. They assured me that with my description they were sure they had the right guy. They just needed me to look up for one second. Later that semester I got a called to testify in court. Thankfully I didn't have to do it. A written account of the incident that I gave to the police that day was enough. There was another girl on campus that had been a victim of this guy before but they were not able to get him.

I think back to this moment now, almost 5 years later. If I had not noticed his smell and felt something was weird about it, I would had never looked up to notice what this guy was wearing, what he looked like. And even after the incident, in my ignorance, I didn't call the police right away. I wasn't sure what was the right thing. I still don't know if I was followed to the student center or if it was all a coincidence. I like to think it was just a coincidence. I wish i had trusted my first impression. I thought he was weird and I stayed there. And the guy took advantage of this opportunity.

Basically that's the main focus of the RAD self-defense program. Take away that opportunity. Move away if you don't feel safe. If you feel something is weird. Trust your senses. They are probably right. Be confident. Look at people in the eye when you walk past them. You'll remember them later if you have to. Look around you. Pay attention to your surroundings.

On Saturday they thought us some 'moves'. Basic punches in case you are attacked. There's the straight punch, to the face. The palm to brake the nose or dislocate jaw. The spear to the eyes or throat. and the extended knuckles to hit the throat. These moves target some of the more sensitives areas in the body. Also, if you hit the radial nerve, that runs from your thumb to your elbow it hurts a lot. So if someone is holding you and you have one free hand, hit that area as hard as you can. And finish the punch like you are breaking the arm. Don't let the impact kill your momentum. Of course the groin area is also very sensitive and the top of your foot. So, as much as you want to target this areas on your aggressor you also want to protect them. So as much as you can, stand with your side facing the aggressor, not your stomach.... I hope that make sense.

So, thats my personalized recap of Saturday's lesson :)